Carnival Splendor- Sunday and Monday morning

Where to even start. I thought about doing this all in one post, but there is just too much, so this is going to be a series- something to look forward to, right? We have tried to make it a little funny, so you don't have to read us complaining so much. We were lucky enough to stumble across the 'captain's log' from our voyage, so you will be fortunate enough to hear this story from multiple perspectives.

Captain's Log Sunday November 7, 2010 1800 hours

The cruise is underway and only a mere 2 hours late. Today was our annual Coast Guard inspection. Even though the passengers had to wait outside in line for 2 extra hours, I'm sure it comforts them to know that we passed with flying colors.

* After a long day of flying, standing in line to check in for the ship, a safety orientation and a 2 hour delay we were excited to eat. We have heard how fun the cruise wait staff can be- ours was about as exciting as a rock. Our waiter- Innocenti- is from India. We called him Manmeet- but not to his face (anyone seen Outsourced?) After dinner we went to the "Welcome Show." After 1.5 hours of mediocre jokes from John, the British cruise director, we decided to leave when the passenger on stage was named Dick Little- you can imagine the jokes that came from that. We decided to hit the club to let loose and get our groove on. Just one problem- there was no one there! So we watched some drunken karaoke and headed off to bed, looking forward to a good night's sleep.

 Spencer looking very excited to go on our cruise

Captain's Log Monday November 8, 2010 0600 hours

Uh Oh- there seems to be quite a bit of smoke in the engine room. It must be a "flameless fire." Whoever said duct tape would fix anything was full of crap.

0700 hours

We have sounded the emergency alarm, woken up all the passengers and brought them to the top deck. Of course, the power is out and elevators don't work. But I'm sure 12 flights of stairs won't be a problem. I'm so excited! I'm going to be just like that guy who landed his plane on the Hudson. I'll be a hero. I wonder what I should wear on Letterman?

0800 hours

For the last hour we have been "dissassissapating" the smoke from the engine and aft cabins. We have instructed the passengers to return to their cabins.

0815 hours

Just kidding- they need to stay on the deck.

0830 hours

Actually those in the forward cabins can return to their rooms. People love a decisive leader. So far the only systems down are the elevators, cabin lights, cabin water, toilet suction, AC/ heating, all food prep areas propulsion and entertainment. Basically anything that needs electricity, so everything. We have received a few complaints, but it could be worse. They could be starving.

1200 Oh dear- they are starving. Luckily I had the crew whip up a delicious meal of kidney beans and shredded carrots. And for dessert- tortilla chips!

* Because we don't drink or gamble, we came on this cruise to eat and get tan. Since all the power was out they couldn't cook anything- so we really ate shredded veggies and canned meats. We both worked out and ate healthy to get in shape for this cruise but I'm pretty sure that we came home skinnier. This is a cruise Gandhi would be proud of. I'm so glad we didn't waste our money on Sketchers Shape-Ups because we took 12 flights of stairs at least 5 times a day. Our calves are looking pretty good.

Spencer looking less excited because our ship is broken

Stay tuned for the next installment :)